Funkmaster

Stinky pits over here has decided to raise his arm up higher than his head on his five foot tall body, in order to hold onto the metal bar of the T next to the doors - nooot because there's standing room only on the train (nope, there's definitely space to sit down) but just because. And that means sharing his funk with yours truly since I'm sitting in the first seat next to the door, smh. Violation, short sir!! It's not even hot out to be smelling like a workout this early in the morning. Regretting the deep breath I just took...

Old School Jams

Oooh my goodness, sir, your R&B love jams are SO OLD and no one wants to hear these throwbacks during rush hour:

"...every freakin night and every freakin day, I wanna freak with you in every single way... What must I saaaay, what must I dooo..."

Enough already! What must I say to get this to stop?? Get some headphones and take this ish off speaker phone!!