TSA hateration

Downside of taking the T: getting stopped twice in two weeks right as your train to go home is pulling into the station stop. TSA!!!!!! Just when I thought I didn't have a temper, my trained pulled off. I knew this red purse was too flashy. TSA was clearly just hating on the flyness.

Unsheltered in Beantown

This is not a big city, but there are a LOT of homeless people in Boston. And it must be really hard. I mean, it's cold, the people are mostly assholes. Even I don't reach into my bag to pull out a dollar for the man who regularly boards at Downtown Crossing asking for fare for the commuter rail. So, it's always confused me why the unsheltered population stays here, year-round, and particularly through the winter? I'm not totally ignorant, and I realize that homelessness happens everywhere, and that on top of that, being without means kind of screws up your winter vacation plans. But I think I'd start heading south. Like the birds, but on foot.

But... if everyone left, who would sing and give me compliments while I waited for the next train?

"Let me hold you tight
if only for one night
let me keep you near
to ease away your fear..."

I know this was a good song when Luther sang it, but when intoxicated Homeless Man #1 sang it, it sounded more like a strained punctuated version of a Luther classic. Painful. Fear-inducing. I'm just glad he wasn't trying to raise money. That would've been really funny because he was baaaad. Although, I'm glad the lyrics touched him...

Another man sat down next to me on a bench at the station and said he liked my purse. Yet another uncomfortable moment. Then he asked me where I was enrolled in school, and told me he'd gotten his PhD from Boston University (so... ix-nay on the PhD plan??). When the train pulled into the station, he followed me onto it from a different doorway... yeah. Discrete. This is why I keep my phone on 911 speed-dial. Turns out he wasn't stalking me. Maybe I could even learn something from his positivity/resilience/willful ignorance/insanity: he complimented the other T-riders even as the people sitting immediately to his right and left got up and moved away to avoid the smell (or the awkwardness of being in close proximity with something that makes us all a little uncomfortable).

Grown and Sexy?! Ha! It's too cold for that

I told my friend that fashion stopped mattering 20 degrees ago. Again, not necessarily true of the driving crowd, but when you have to bundle up for survival, you stop caring if your boots match your scarf or if the extra layers look too bulky. If you're warm, then it doesn't even matter. The cold ones of us keep it cold-weather fly (or super unfly) in fleeces, extra puffy coats, snow boots that look like we killed an animal, and other such attire.

Apparently, thinking like this puts me in good company with parents of small children. Indeed, the little people are the only other ones I see bundled to perfection, matching or not, albeit looking much cuter while doing it. I think part of the cuteness is that they have no choice, and you can see that in their confused faces. I remember being 6 or 7 and crying because my Dad told me I had to wear these fugly jeans lined with plaid-patterned fleece. Of course they had to be rolled up at the ankle for the cuteness (read fugliness) to have its full effect. It made me so mad - the struggles of not being able to choose your personal style!! But really, I wish I had those now. Sorry for the struggles, Dad. I would totally wear those now.

There are a lot of people who still do care about fashion in wintertime Boston, and look cold while doing it, but for the most part, I assume they're not full-time pedestrians or tiny tots. I say, at least in winter, lets relax the standard and redefine this whole "grown and sexy" thing... any takers?

Hardcore workout

For those of us who don't go to the gym - like, ever - walking to the bus or train station can be a major accomplishment. Ok, so I'm not completely without hope of a quickened heartbeat, but getting to the train station requires either a 15-minute walk or a 4-minute bus ride. You see what I mean? The problem is in the waiting. Sometimes, the bus takes 15 minutes to arrive and that's when I have to muster up my anger management skills ("I could have been there by now!!.. breathe").

Anyhow, back to the workout. This morning, I almost overheated on my way to the train station. It's Saturday, I was in no rush, and I decided to just "walk it out". I'm still not accustomed to how hot I can get underneath 3 layers of clothing, and I nearly broke a sweat on a 30-degree day. Yes, out here in Boston's pedestrian-land, it's been so cold the last couple of weeks that a 30-degree day feels like Heaven. (By comparison, I stepped outside a few days ago to 1 degree air... On the bright side, it wasn't windy that day, so I could still breathe without freezing my face AND my throat.) Still in 30 degrees, I'm reluctant to go without the long-johns, although as the winter progresses, it feels like they're less and less necessary. But I guess I like sweating. Seriously, you know you've been in New England for a minute when 30 degrees starts to feel like 60 and 1 starts to feel like 10. But hey. Anything beats waking up to another 1 degree day. (Unless it was -15 the day before.)

That's disgusting

I had a hard tme keeping my breakfast down this morning after overhearing the woman next to me describe in detail over the phone how her sick cat puked... no vomited, AND had diarrhea on someone else's bed. By the time she started talking about cleaning the bedspread, I just wanted it to be over. And judging by the pain the cat was in, little fuzzy probably just wanted it to be over too, or at least not to have his business spread willy-nilly in the streets. Get fuzzy to a vet, por favor!

This isn't gym class!!!

I really thought that the last appropriate place to publically wear sweatpants was at the gym, or in physical education. So why are people still riding the T in baggy tight-ankled sweatpants??? LOL! Can this be banned? Seriously though...

The Breaking Point

Remember the science teacher from the Wonder Years, Mr. Cantwell? His real name is Ben Stein, and he also played up the same famously monotonous voice on the Visine commercials? Well, apparently, he's also a subway conductor/announcer for the Boston MBTA.

Ok, not really. But there is a T-conductor who sounds JUST like him. I've heard his gently depressing bass monotone (think Eeyore from Winnie the Pooh) at least once every couple of weeks when our paths cross on the T. "Neeext stop... Dooowntooown Crooossing."

A couple of days ago somebody made him mad, proving that the monotone is actually his relaxed alter ego. I guess the passengers at Downtown Crossing were not listening when he told them to step back from the yellow line, and Mr. Monotone called out a certain gentleman for not paying attention! I was shocked!! I'm still hoping not to be on his bad side, ever. I prefer him as Eeyore/Mr. Cantwell.